Welcome to this online Elul spirituality retreat, written by Rabbi Marcia Plumb and sponsored by Congregation Mishkan Tefila. Every day during the month of Elul, you will receive a ‘Word to Live By’. The words will be in alphabetical order, similar to the Ashamnu prayer during the Yamim Noraim. The Ashamnu lists our sins from the past, but our Elul words contain hope for the future.
You can use the word, and the teaching that comes with it, to set an intention for your day, to help you live your day based on the word. You may want to share it with a friend, who has need of just that word. You may be busy, and simply notice the word in the subject heading, then, skip to the next email….and that is fine too. Noticing can be enough.
At the end of the month, at Rosh Hashanah, I hope, because of our Words, our hearts will be softer, our minds more open to new ways of thinking, and our actions more compassionate.
With prayers for healing and renewal, Rabbi Marcia Plumb, Congregation Mishkan Tefila, Brookline MA
Apology/ Slicha
I knew someone who hated to apologize. She believed that all conflict is a two way street. Everyone in the interaction shares responsibility for the situation. If she apologized, then it was as if she had taken full responsibility for the problem. She also saw it as an abandonment of Self. If she says, ‘I’m sorry,’ then she gives her power away to the other person. That attitude is similar with the one of my favorite tough nut TV characters, Jethro Gibbs in NCIS, the forensics crime show. He insists one should never apologize as it is a sign of weakness.
At High Holy Days, we are given a different interpretation of Apology. It is not a sign of surrender. Rather it is a bridge. An apology becomes a bridge which two who are separated can cross over to reconnect. As Nahman of Bratslav says, ‘Kol haolam kulo, gesher tzar m’od, v’haikar lo lephachad clal’ “All the world is a narrow bridge. The main thing is not to be afraid.’ Apologies can calm anger, soothe a broken heart, and create a way down from inflated pride. They are the gesher, the bridge, that help those who have turned away from each other, to turn back, reach out and start again. The main thing is not to be afraid to build the bridge with the words, ‘I’m sorry.’
Spiritual Practice Today, notice when we resist saying “I’m sorry.’ Instead of watching our friend, colleague, or life partner from afar, build a bridge and see what happens when you apologize.
Mussar @ Mishkan Tefila
Congregation Mishkan Tefila 384 Harvard St. Brookline, MA 02446
